Rejection is not something people deal with easily. When people are turned down because the other wants to preserve her own freedom, it is hard not to feel a small bit of resentment for the person who made them feel rejected. But, as individuals get older, most learn to deal with rejection in a mature manner, because people who are self-aware understand they are not the only ones who matter in the world. Unfortunately not in cases of domestic abuse, the partner who feels rejection takes this as a sign of their significant other attempting to break free, which causes the abuser to reassert power by any means necessary. This happens all too frequently, particularly in relationships where the individual lives in a society that has always made people feel entitled to act as they please without facing the consequences.
This is what brings us to Asma Yaqoob’s story. As a young 25-year-old woman in Pakistan, Asma was a devout Christian who was proud of her faith and her independence. Although she was illiterate, Asma held her Christian values very near and dear to her heart and preached God’s word as often as possible.1 She was considered a minority in Pakistan since Islam is the majority religion, but she still refused to conform to the traditional Pakistani values and continued to openly practice her Christian Faith and share the gospel with everyone she encountered.
Asma was a headstrong woman who was not easily taken advantage of, unlike many Pakistani women taught to be submissive at a young age. Asma was a unique woman because rather than succumb to the oppression, she stood up for herself and her independence. However, not all people support women standing up for themselves and their rights. To improve women’s participation in the political system, Pakistan is finally creating laws that help women to slowly break through the walls of political confinement. For instance, in the 2011 Prevention of Anti-Women Practices Act, it finally became illegal for women to be forced into a marriage. This caused much controversy, as it has always been the tradition for families to arrange their children’s marriages. This is a massive breakthrough, as this is a start at giving women the necessary freedom they deserve.2 Another massive breakthrough is that 2018 is the first year in history when Pakistani women could vote in a public election. This was accomplished when Pakistan’s government enacted a mandate stating that no voting results will be accepted unless 10% of women have voted in the district. A major step for women was accomplished this year, with percentages of women who voted rising from 12% to 44% this year alone.3
Although history has been made in recent years with women inching closer to gaining more rights, the majority of the population are not always ready to support this modernization and prefer women to stay in their place confined to the private home sphere. Muhammad Rizwan Gujjar, Asma’s boyfriend, certainly felt that way. He met her through Asma’s brother, and he immediately fell in love with Asma.4 After a few weeks, Muhammad immediately knew that he wanted to marry Asma. She was smart, beautiful, knew how to cook and clean, and perfect for a family. Muhammad had a job and would be able to provide for a family in the future. Sounds like a 1950’s match made in heaven, right? One would think so, if Asma conformed to societal norms and did not speak her mind. But, this was not the case. He was determined to have a wife and family who practiced his religion and supported his values, no exceptions. The couple began arguing incessantly over Asma’s refusing to convert. Eventually, Asma realized that the relationship was not worth converting over and broke up the engagement with Muhammad.
Asma was happy to move on with her life, as she was no longer bound to convert to a religion that she did not want to follow. This was a defining moment for Asma. Around the world women are typically too afraid to leave abusive relationships, instead choosing to endure abuse. They feel that they have no other options and would rather have security in a life of oppression than face the world alone, scared of the violent response of their forlorn husband. It is still taboo for women to get divorced. So much so that women who get divorced are ostracized from their communities and forced by their own families to return back to the abusive husband because protecting family honor is prioritize over women’s safety.5 Asma had not married him yet and so she decided to get out of the relationship. Enjoy her return to freedom, Asma went back to her normal life. One of her father’s friends came to visit her family when there was a knock on the door. Asma went to answer the door and saw Muhammad who told her that she must convert and marry him the next morning.6 Strong in her stance, Asma rejected his demands. Muhammad grew extremely angry with her. He dowsed her in gasoline and set her on fire before fleeing from the scene. Asma’s family heard her screams and rushed her to Lahore’s Mayo Hospital where she eventually died because the burns were too severe and covered most of her body. Muhammad was eventually found and arrested.7
Asma’s story is one of courage and inspiration to women around the world. She stood up for herself and for her freedom in spite of the impossible circumstances surrounding her. Although Pakistan passed the “Acid and Burn Crime Bill 2017,” the list of victims continued to grow every year.8 But, it is because of stories like Asma’s and many other women who resist abuse that these cases are slowly decreasing. Pakistani society now takes legal action rather than the previous traditional ignorance of these crimes. Asma, an amazing woman has put the Pakistani society on a better path to a better future. Although there is still a long way to go, Asma has shown women that saying NO is an option and their fight for freedom and equality continues. Asma’s name and honor stance will live on in the hearts of many women who grow strong inspired by her strength and faith.
- Asif Aqeel, Pakistani Christian Dies after Being Set on Fire by Muslim in Alleged Dispute over Who Should Convert (Pakistan: World Watch Monitor, 2018). ↵
- Punjab Information Technology Board, Prevention of Anti-Women Practices Act, 2011(Pakistan: The Punjab Commission On The Status of Women (Pakistan: The Punjab Commission On The Status of Women, 2015). ↵
- TRT World and Agencies, Pakistani Women Make History As Some Vote For the First Time (Turkey: TRT World, 2018). ↵
- Asif Yeshel, Relationships Cannot Be Forced, We Must Learn to Take a ‘no’ (Lahore: Daily Times, 2018). ↵
- Lauvut Zahid, These Women Stayed in Abusive Relationships Because Pakistan Failed Them (Pakistan: Dawn, 2017). ↵
- Mark Ellis, Pakistan: Christian Woman Set on Fire after She Refuses to Convert, Marry (God Reports, 2018). ↵
- Kaleem Dean, Asma Yaqoob- A Tale of Courageous Woman (Lahore: Daily Times, 2018). ↵
- Leena Nishtar, Eradicating Acid Violence (Pakistan: The Express Tribune, 2018). ↵
61 comments
Roberto Rodriguez
What a crazy story, it makes me extremely sad that some people do not know how to maturely deal with a break up. This horrific story should have never happened and to even think that something like this could happen is absolutely tragic. It is even more tragic that not everyone has the rights to freedom of speech in the world (in my opinion it is a basic human right), this story should not be a cautionary story in the sense that nothing like this should ever happen again.
Kristina Tijerina
Asma Yaqoob is an inspiring individual who believed in women speaking their minds and leaving abusive relationships. She was very intelligent, and knew what was best for her. Her getting married to Muhammad was not what was best for her. Although Muhammad thought Asma would be the perfect wife, he was not willing to deal with her very open mind about going against the standards in Pakistan. Asma was a courageous woman for leaving an abusive relationship, and it is unfortunate that some of the men in Pakistan are so close-minded. Asma didn’t have to be burned like that just because she didn’t want to marry a man who was trying to make her convert and act a certain way.
Angelina Gonzalez
This is such an unfortunate event that should have never happened. I wish the article included more information on the leading events that took place to Mohammed. I only hope justice was served and his punishment is long and makes his pay. It is so sad that these horrific events occur while someone is doing something they believe in.
Hannah Hennon
This story is so crazy. I would have never expected her ex would come back after breaking up and pour gasoline on her and set her on fire. I heard in some Middle Eastern countries where they would pour gasoline on their wives if they misbehaved and would set them on fire to watch. It is disgusting. It is so sad that she had to pass away, but at least she passed standing up for what she believed in.
Stephanie Cerda
This story is really emotional, and it’s really inspiring. I think it’s hard to hear about situations like these because there’s not much that can be done now. Her story, although very devastating, is helpful to the future and to the future victims of abuse. Hopefully, as a reality kick, Asma’s life won’t just be overlooked. As said in the article, her name should remain present, and people should be inspired by her faith and strength.
Amanda Quiroz
Asma Yaqoob was a strong woman. I like that she didn’t give in so easily, and the fact that she stood behind what she believed in regardless of what the consequences tells us more about her. It’s a sad story but incredibly inspiring. Freedom of speech is something that although we have, others might not. The fact that she spoke out, shows how brave she was.
Analisa Cervantes
Asma Yaqoob’s story is one of fierce independence and knowing your rights. She refused to convert to Islam for her boyfriend. She valued herself and was not afraid to speak her mind. This ultimately cost Asma her life but her story lived on. She became an example for other women in the world. She reminds us to not take abuse lying down.
Kelsey Sanchez
I am really glad Asma was able to strive for what she wanted and stood up for herself. I am so surprised and shock by the way Muhammad reacted towards her not wanting what he did. It is unbelievable to hear how such cruel people can exist, especially have women be the target in most situations such as Asmas. I believe she was a strong woman overall and simply wanted her freedom. This article reflects on the ways women should not keep themselves in danger or be with someone that doesn’t allow them to have rights. It was quite sad to hear this story and what had happened to Asma.
Judy Reyes
This was a very inspiring and impactful article. Having freedom of speech should be everybody’s right. Although that is not necessarily their law, she stood up for what she believed in. It was incredible to see that she chose to worship God openly instead of behind closed doors. Majority of people who are not allowed to worship God will not do it publically. Her courage has inspired many and that will continue to live on through her legacy.
Saira Locke
Everyone should read this article on Asma Yaqoob. This is a very inspiring story and I believe it can help many women in today’s world. Many women are currently in very abusive relationships and are scared to leave their abuser because they don’t want to go through a divorce. This is also how the women in Pakistan felt. It is very sad to hear that situations like Asmas have to happen for reality to kick in for the people of Pakistan. Asma had to die in a very torturous way for the people of Pakistan to realize that their traditional ways are wrong.