She never got to blow out the fourteen candles in front of her. She never wore that birthday tiara that she was so excited to show off. Most of all, she was never happy with the remaining minutes of her life.
Megan Taylor Meier was born in O’Fallon, Missouri, on November 6, 1992, to Christina “Tina” Meier and Ronald “Ron” Meier. Although she was described as a happy and bubbly girl who enjoyed spending time with her friends and family, life was never easy for young Megan.1 She struggled with weight problems, depression, and attention deficit disorder. When Megan was in third grade, she talked about committing suicide, and ever since then, she had been in the continuous care of a psychiatrist. By the time she reached eighth grade, things got better for Megan. She lost twenty pounds, she was on the volleyball team, and she was in a better mental state. All in all, it was a fresh start for Megan.2
Megan’s life changed when she was introduced to the popular social networking web, Myspace. Back when Facebook was still on the rise, teens were using Myspace as a platform to socialize, post pics, and talk. Some even went as far as opening fake accounts to talk or just have false identities and play pranks on each other. Megan and her friend Sara Drew were no different. Sara was the girl that lived four houses down, and they both were good friends. They opened a fake profile of a girl on My space to talk to boys. When Megan’s mom Tina found out, she was really disappointed by her daughter’s wrongdoings and banned her daughter from using Myspace ever again. And soon Megan had cut ties with her friend Sara and was in a constant on and off friendship.3
Social media refers to Internet-based applications that allow people to create and exchange content using digital network technologies. Over the years, social media has gained a wide audience, mostly teens. Teens are likely to be obsessed with social media because their underdeveloped frontal cortex cannot manage the distraction and temptations that come with social media. A survey showed that 86% of girls within the age of 15-17 have a social media profile, which is higher than that of boys in that same age group. They are primarily drawn to social media for personal connections and the opportunity to share activities with their followers and friends.4
“I’ve raised three kids, and the technology changed a lot from the time my first kid became a teenager to the time my third kid became a teenager,” said Waslick, chief of Child Psychiatry at Baystate Medical Center.5
For better or for worse, social media has had a huge impact on teens. It has made the spread of information much easier and faster. One can learn about people with varied backgrounds, enhance their creativity by sharing musical and artistic projects, collaborate on school projects outside of class, raise money for charity, and so on. However, not everything about social media is positive. Rather, it often comes with negative consequences, replacing face-to-face socialization with plastic screens, hindering teens from developing self-confidence and real-life social skills. Some other negative aspects of social media include cyberbullying, sexting, sleep deprivation, Facebook depression, and poor academic performance.6
When she was almost fourteen years old, Megan begged her mother for a second chance on Myspace. Tina reluctantly agreed, but her agreement came with rules on how to use it. Megan had to use her computer in the main room with her parents around. Her parents would be the only ones to have the password to her Myspace account, and Megan had to run any friend request acceptance by her parents.7
Not long after she had re-opened her Myspace account, she received a friend request from a boy named Josh Evans. Evans claimed to be from Florida and had recently moved to O’Fallon. He told Megan that he played the guitar and drums and that he had come from a broken home. They shared a lot about themselves, so much so that Megan started to like him. However, Evans never bothered to share his contact information, and this was really sketchy to Tina. When Megan asked him for his phone number, he claimed that he didn’t have a cell phone and that his mother didn’t have a landline yet.8 Tina was hesitant about Evans, and she even went to the police department to figure out whether he was real, but nothing could be known.9
On Sunday, October 15, 2006, Megan received a disturbing message from Josh:
“I don’t know if I want to be friends with you anymore, because I’ve heard that you are not very nice to your friends.”10
Confused, Megan responded,
“What are you talking about?”11
But Josh never responded.12
The following day, Megan handed out invitations to her fourteenth birthday party. At the end of the day, she rushed back home to check if Josh had responded to her last message. Instead, she found out that he was sending her upsetting messages, and he was sharing their messages with others online. Tina, who was in a rush to get to work, saw that her daughter was really upset and told her to sign off, but Megan didn’t listen. Instead, she fought back using vulgar language.13
Later, when Tina called her daughter and asked her if she had signed off, Megan said,
“They are all being so mean to me.”14
Tina insisted that Megan sign off the website. Fifteen minutes later, Megan called her mother crying.
“They are posting bulletins about me. Megan is a slut. Megan Meier is fat.”15
Most people think of bullying as a childhood issue children will outgrow, but bullies are growing up and entering university campuses. Bullying refers to unwanted, violent, and unnecessary behavior among school-aged children that involves a real or observed power inequality. Bullying includes actions such as making threats, spreading rumors, attacking someone physically or verbally, excluding someone from a group, and sending embarrassing messages to another person. Bullying can occur in person or through technology, and it has serious and enduring negative effects on the mental health and overall well-being of youth. Bullying includes those who bully others and those who are bullied, as well as those who both bully others and are bullied by others, sometimes referred to as bully-victims.16
The negative consequences of bullying may include depression, anxiety, involvement in interpersonal violence or sexual violence, substance abuse, poor social functioning, and poor school performance, including lower grade point averages, standardized test scores, and poor attendance. Youths who report frequently bullying others and youths who report being frequently bullied are at increased risk for suicide-related behavior. Youths who report both bullying others and being bullied (bully-victims) have the highest risk for suicide-related behavior of any group involved in bullying.17
Technology has become a big part of young people’s lives and it plays an increasingly important role in their day-to-day activities. However, it has also become a platform for so many young people to bully each other. Cyber-bullying has become a serious problem for university students and can cause long-term effects on victims. Avenues for cyber-bullying include emails, blogs, text messages, and social networking sites such as Facebook, MySpace, WhatsApp, Instagram, and Twitter.18
Tina was angry at Megan for not listening to her and using vulgar language. Megan was furious at her for not taking her side, so she left the room yelling at her mom. As Tina got ready to eat dinner, she had this gut feeling that something was wrong. When she rushed to her daughter’s room, she found her hanging from her closet and immediately called the neighbor to perform CPR before rushing Megan to the hospital. However, Megan was pronounced dead the following day.19
After Megan’s death, her family sought a grief counselor to deal with the trauma of losing their daughter. When Megan’s dad, Rob, went to her MySpace account to see who this “Josh Evans” was, he saw that Josh had deleted his account and vanished into thin air. Even the FBI couldn’t trace where the messages came from. It wasn’t until a month later that the Meiers discovered who was responsible for their child’s death. One of their neighbors, Michele Mulford, told the Meiers that Curt and Lori Drew, who lived four houses down, had created “Josh” with their daughter Sara, a longtime friend of Megan’s. Even Mulford’s own daughter, also thirteen, had been given the password to the account and had sent at least one unkind message to Megan in Josh’s name. Unfortunately, when the Meiers took the Drews to trial, the law could not prosecute them and Megan’s death was ruled a suicide.20
Suicide, from the Latin word suicidium, is the act of taking one’s own life. Suicide is the second leading cause of death among teenagers in the United States and has become a growing concern. Suicide affects all teens, but some groups are at higher risk than others. Boys are more likely than girls to die from suicide. Of reported suicides in the 10 to 24 age group, 81% of deaths were males and 19% were females. Girls, however, are more likely to report attempting suicide than boys, a number likely to double up in the LGBTQ community.21
Cultural variations in suicide rates also exist. Native American/Alaskan Native youth have the highest rates of suicide-related fatalities, and a nationwide survey of youths in grades 9-12 in public and private schools in the United States found Hispanic youths were more likely to report attempting suicide than their black and white, non-Hispanic peers. Several factors can put a young person at risk for suicide: a history of previous suicide attempts, a family history of suicide, a history of depression or other mental illnesses, alcohol or drug abuse, stressful life events or loss, and easy access to lethal methods. However, having these risk factors does not always mean that suicide will occur.22
The Meiers were devastated by their daughter’s death but had to keep going. Tina and Rob got a divorce, and in December 2007, Tina launched the Megan Meier Foundation, a nonprofit organization against bullying that offers day-long workshops to more than 280,000 students, parents, and educators across 36 states. In August 2007, Tina opened the Megan Meier Foundation Resource Center in St. Charles, Missouri, which offers free counseling, assistance and support to kids who’ve been bullied and their families.23
“This started out of such tragedy,” she said, “then it became this passion and ultimately a mission I went into with full force.”24
- Lauren Collins, “Friend Game,” New Yorker, January 2008, 34-35. ↵
- Abigayle Korinne, “Cyberbullying: Megan Meier’s Story,” Hubpages, October 22, 2014,http://www.cuomosite.com/fc1112/Story%20of%20Megan%20Meier.pdf. ↵
- Abigayle Korinne, “Cyberbullying: Megan Meier’s Story,” Hubpages, October 22, 2014,http://www.cuomosite.com/fc1112/Story%20of%20Megan%20Meier.pdf. ↵
- Joseph Bednar, “Screen pass should young teens be active in social media?” Business West, (2017): 27-29, 36. ↵
- Joseph Bednar, “Screen pass should young teens be active in social media?” Business West, (2017): 27. ↵
- K. Y, “Social Media and Teens,” School Library Journal 64, no.10 (2018): 1-2. ↵
- Abigayle Korinne, “Cyberbullying: Megan Meier’s Story,” Hubpages, October 22, 2014,http://www.cuomosite.com/fc1112/Story%20of%20Megan%20Meier.pdf ↵
- Abigayle Korinne, “Cyberbullying: Megan Meier’s Story,” Hubpages, October 22, 2014, http://www.cuomosite.com/fc1112/Story%20of%20Megan%20Meier.pdf. ↵
- Lauren Collins, “Friend Game,” New Yorker, January 2008, 37. ↵
- Abigayle Korinne, “Cyberbullying: Megan Meier’s Story,” Hubpages, October 22, 2014, http://www.cuomosite.com/fc1112/Story%20of%20Megan%20Meier.pdf. ↵
- Abigayle Korinne, “Cyberbullying: Megan Meier’s Story,” Hubpages, October 22, 2014, http://www.cuomosite.com/fc1112/Story%20of%20Megan%20Meier.pdf. ↵
- Abigayle Korinne, “Cyberbullying: Megan Meier’s Story,” Hubpages, October 22, 2014, http://www.cuomosite.com/fc1112/Story%20of%20Megan%20Meier.pdf. ↵
- Abigayle Korinne, “Cyberbullying: Megan Meier’s Story,” Hubpages, October 22, 2014, http://www.cuomosite.com/fc1112/Story%20of%20Megan%20Meier.pdf. ↵
- Abigayle Korinne, “Cyberbullying: Megan Meier’s Story,” Hubpages, October 22, 2014, http://www.cuomosite.com/fc1112/Story%20of%20Megan%20Meier.pdf. ↵
- Abigayle Korinne, “Cyberbullying: Megan Meier’s Story,” Hubpages, October 22, 2014, http://www.cuomosite.com/fc1112/Story%20of%20Megan%20Meier.pdf. ↵
- P.P.Tsorai, T.J.Mudau, Nanga Raymond Raselekoane “Gender differences in cyber-bullying among first-year University of Venda students,” Gender and Behavior, no. 3 (2019): 13848. ↵
- “Bullying And Suicide.” In Teen Health Series: Suicide Information for Teens, edited by Keith Jones. 3rd ed. Omnigraphics, Inc., 2017. ↵
- “Bullying And Suicide,” In Teen Health Series: Suicide Information for Teens, edited by Keith Jones. 3rd ed. Omnigraphics, Inc., 2017. ↵
- Abigayle Korinne, “Cyberbullying: Megan Meier’s Story” Hubpages, October 22, 2014, http://www.cuomosite.com/fc1112/Story%20of%20Megan%20Meier.pdf ↵
- Lauren Collins, “FRIEND GAME” New Yorker, January 2008, 38-41. ↵
- “Suicide Among LGBT Youth,” In Teen Health Series: Suicide Information for Teens, edited by Keith Jones. 3rd ed. Omnigraphics, Inc., 2017. ↵
- “Teen Suicide Statistics,” In Teen Health Series: Suicide Information for Teens, edited by Keith Jones. 3rd ed. Omnigraphics, Inc., 2017. ↵
- Jeff Truesdell, “Finding Hope After My Daughter’s Suicide,” People 87, no.19 (2017): 74-75. ↵
- Jeff Truesdell, “Finding Hope After My Daughter’s Suicide,” People 87, no.19 (2017): 74-75. ↵
60 comments
Amberlee Flores
This is one of many stories that I have heard about cyberbullying. I think that this is the worse generation because of what we are capable with update technology that we know so much about. Teens these do not know their limits to the things that they call jokes. They do not realize that people have personal problems going on. Social media should be used to bring happiness to others, to catch up with distance friends, and to see what is going in the world. Teens should not make others end their lives.
Margaret Cavazos
This article showed how technology can be used to harm school-aged kids, and how bullying can go beyond physical threats and enter the home. It is tragic that Megan’s parents tried to place boundaries and even that could not prevent harm from coming to their child. This article also included important statistics and facts about cyberbullying and suicide. This one case is all the more tragic since the harmful comments came from a former friend that likely knew the insecurities of the victim, and shared them with other community members with the intent to harm.
Micheal Baladez
Since I was bullied as a kid, I can sympathize deeply with Megan Meier’s story, with the exception of a few key points. In this age of technology, we are all connected in such a way that we can never truly be rid of one another even if we tried, there’s recommendations, mutual friends, old message chats, and photos with reminders when you took them after a year or so. Personally speaking, I do not believe that cyber-bullying is such a big problem because I know that everyone likes to make themselves tougher behind a glass screen, yet I couldn’t have imagined that one would actually take their own life through the relentless ridicule that they face at the hands of their own peers. Since technology is such a pivotal part of our lives, it is virtually impossible to ignore or avoid such tragedies from happening on a day to day basis. If we try to censor the internet, bad things in the real world will increase, and if we try to censor the real world, bad tings online will increase. All things considered, cyber-bullying is a problem for those who do not share the same sympathies as I do. In order to protect those who are subjected to this day in and day out, is to be there when they need you – face to face.
Kayla Mendez
Megan Meier’s story is only of one the thousands of suicide cases caused by cyberbullying. Therefore, I’m glad the author took the opportunity to expand off of Megan’s experience to talk about the long-term consequences of bullying on and offline. Sadly, as a social media user, this cycle of bullying doesn’t seem to be slowing down, if anything it’s become much more intense. There’s been a new concept swirling social media in these past two years, called “cancel culture”. It is the event where a social media user is bullied/forced off of social media for something they did/said. Of course, some of these users have truly done something unacceptable to society, but many have only voiced their opinion that disagrees with the majority. Coincidently, before reading this article, I had already been contemplating leaving social media due to its toxicity. Using less of social media might help everyone grow compassion towards others, rather than seeing people as another username in a system.
Nadia Manitzas
Reading this very well written Article almost brought me tears because it kind of hits close to home. The thing about our generation is that we become so unaware of when we are doing some sort of cyberbullying. Sometimes things start off as a funny joke but when you constantly do it over and over again it can seriously affect someones life ultimately leading them to think that death is the best way out of the situation. Another problem with social media is the thought of “Oh you can just delete it” or “there’s always a way to clear your name” encourages the bullying to continue because there is always a loophole when it comes to social media, which is so scary to think about. As a community we need to come together to encourage the use of counseling or therapist because they are there to help you not hurt you. No one ever deserves to experience bullying of any sort. Treat everyone with kindness and love.
Reynaldo Rodriguez
This is probably some of the most difficult subjects to talk about since this should not be happening in our day and age. However this is not the case and cyber bullying still exists and it is stronger then ever affecting thousands upon thousands of children and teenagers across the nation. There is hope shining in this everlasting darkness with the amount of help programs and counseling available to those that are in need and have no one to talk to. With these programs not established the rate of suicide is dropping, but people still need to act in order to make sure that no one ever has to go through something that Tina and her family went through.
Andrew Gallegos
I don’t get how people can bully people everyone in this world is perfect just the way they are. And it’s sad how her best friend can do that to her knowing what shes has been going through all her life. I wish I could of been her friend to be there for her and maybe should would be here today. Cyberbully has been going on for so long and I don’t get why people can hurt people online or even in person. It needs to stop kids have been killing themselves because they feel alone , they feel nobody loves them. But I have something to tell all of you i may not know you but i love you I’ll be your friend you don’t need to go through this alone and take your life away because your life is so precious in this world.
Kate Pacheco
It is new information to me that suicide is “the second leading cause of death among teenagers in the United States” and that more male teenagers commit suicide than female teenagers. The questions, “What can be done?” and “How can we address this?” came into mind when I read this. In order to address cyberbullying, should we delete social media platforms? should we put an age limit on social media? should all parents be advised to monitor their children’s habits on social media? Should even more programs for anti-bullying come in to place?
Bullying has been a problem for years and there have been programs and campaigns that have tried to address these problems. Maybe more emphasis should be put on how to use social media. Over the years I have heard discussion on just wanting to delete social media all together, or putting children restrictions on social media. However, I do not think the problem is social media itself but in how it is being used. Children usually can only learn so much by themselves. They need guidance. If there is no one to guide them on social media to explain how it should be used then more than likely children will just do whatever they want on there. Teaching them how to use it and penalizing them when/if they use it inappropriately can possibly have a good effect on how teens use social media.
On another note, I think it is great that Christina Meier made a program for people to learn more about bullying and how to address it, as well as offering different services for people. The death of her daughter had a huge impact on her and she wanted to help others, and I think that is what life is all about; learning, growing, progressing, and helping each other out.
Mia Hernandez
Technology should be an opportunity for us to connect not to break each other down. I do not understand how people think it is okay to hurt someone else just because they don’t know their value. Words really do affect people and this article does a great job on showcasing it. Cyber bullying is just as bad as bullying face to face and it needs to stop. My parents always told me “if you do not have anything nice to say then don’t say anything at all” and I think everyone should live by that.
Jarred Deptawa
This story is truly heartbreaking, but unfortunately all too common. While bullying has always been issue, in the past once you left school so did the bullying; unfortunately, as this article points out, with the advent of social media and internet anonymity the bullying has become more intense and inescapable. Also, on that note while bullying, self-harm, and suicide have increased it has only been in the past 10-20 years that mental health has been a talked about issue. Before that and even to some degree today talking about mental health and seeing a professional was taboo and would often cause you to be the target of further bullying and stigmatization. It is truly time for the mental health and public health systems to come together in a meaningful way.